Doing what's expected

I was over on Indieheaven.com tonight reading a post written by a fellow musician and was hit square in the forehead by his straight forward comments that seemed to verbalize thoughts right out of my own head. One paragraph from his post went as follows:

I have discovered that we are all programmed to the American ideal to some extent and automatically do a bunch of things we're "supposed to do". I didn't have some master plan to be married by 25 and buy a house and raise 2 kids. I mean I had a general idea that I should, but it was kind of wired in. I wouldn't trade my family for anything, but many of us our living by rules we didn't sign up for sometimes to the detriment of the plan God has for us.

At age 38 (soon to be 39 in one month from today), that paragraph rang true of me and my life. Just like my fellow indie artist, I would never trade my wife and four kids in a million years. (I might be easily persuaded to trade my "fixer up" house, my run down vehicles, and my bills, but never EVER my family.) However, sometimes I wonder if having a family and working a fulltime, 40 plus hour a week job just to get by was really what God had intended for me to do with my life. I often wonder what more I could be doing for Him if I hadn't followed "the norm"... followed the "expected" path of every American male, especially good Christian boys who are taught that they need to grow up dependable, loyal, faithful, hardworking, responsible... What does a responsible Christian man look like? Is it one who does everything that is "expected" of him? Or is it one who takes bold leaps of faith, based solely on God's call on his heart and the leading of the Holy Spirit, to do that which he was created to do... serve God completely in every facet of his life and not let "life" get in his way. Wouldn't my wife and kids rather have that man as their husband and father than the one who dutifully does what is required by society and expected by the average citizen, and in so doing, wastes the time he has been given to do the tasks for which he was meant? Wouldn't the family God has entrusted me to care for be better served if I was a better servant of my God?

Lord, help me to see and know what it is you want me to be doing. Help me to make wise decisions on how to spend my time, money, talents that I might better serve You and not just meet someone's "expectations" or follow some path that has been presumed as a requirement to be validated as a Christian man.

No, I don't have any plans to quit my job, run away to join the circus, buck the system and be a rebel at church (well, I may change my mind on that "rebel" part)... But I do want to be sure I am busy about God's work in my life, making the right choices at the right times, and taking advantage of every moment I have on earth to further His kingdom in the manner He designed me for.

You've got to be seriously bad to get that!

My great-grandmother was a wonderful woman. I miss her still today, even though she died 25 years ago. I spent a lot of time visiting her as a young teen, hearing her stories, sharing a glass of milk and a cookie or two... But not everyone felt the same way about her as I did... namely her step-father. He was a mean man, or so I was told, and one Christmas my great-grandmother didn't get a stocking full of coal... she got a stocking full of chicken droppings! How sad for a child to wake up to that on Christmas morning.

That story (as well as many others) have been told a time or two to my kids, and this Christmas it came back with a twist. While joking with our four little ones, my wife made a comment about how "naughty children might get a stocking full of coal", to which my oldest daughter, Breanna (age 10), added "or chicken poop!" Without missing a beat, my youngest daughter, Meagan (soon to be 4) chimed in with "or horse poop!" My, you've got to be seriously bad to get that!

Thank you, God, for not sending what we all deserve and instead giving us your Son to die in our place! I'm so glad you are a loving, caring, faithful Father to us all, despite how naughty we are and can be repeatedly!

So, who's the new guy?

No, I'm not new... but after being away from the world of blog writing for over a year and a half, I feel as though I'm just starting out again. How appropriate that this fresh start comes at the beginning of a new year, right? I don't know what exactly made me return to the concept of blogging... Maybe it was the notion that somehow getting my thoughts down in typed form helps to stir the juices in my ever-growing-older brain... Or maybe it was the concept that journaling helps to bring thoughts and ideas together that eventually give you great material for song lyrics (another thing I do from time to time, as an independent musician). Whatever the case, here I am again, rustiness and all, ready to begin thinking in black and white again. I hope and pray that I am able to write something worthwhile that impacts/speaks to the small handful of you who may stop by my page(s) once in awhile.

Along with this fresh start, I have made the decision that my words will be posted on two seperate blog websites. I recently signed up for an account on Vox.com in order to post a comment on a friend's blog. At that time I didn't intend to maintain two accounts on two sites, but over the last couple months I have enjoyed the features of the Vox website, and seeing/reading the weekly updates from people I know on Vox. So, for what it's worth, I will (with this post as the beginning) start copying my posts in two locations on the web. You can now find my thoughts at both of the following URLs:

http://blackhatter1.blogspot.com/

http://blackhatter1.vox.com/